Just call me Indefatigable.

“Say, you don't happen to have any plans for the evening, do you?” Most girls smile at the thought of those words. The phrase conjures up images of the cute co-worker about to ask if you would like to join him for dinner later that evening. A few drinks, a nice dinner, some juicy gosspy to share with the friends in the morning... sounds like a pretty good evening. However, that same little phrase can also take on a completely different and much more sinister meaning than an inquiry as to whether or not you would like to go out for an enjoyable evening with an attractive male, when uttered by your happy-married-with-three-young-kids PI. Suddenly, you wish you really did have legitimate plans, like tickets to the symphony or visiting your sick aunt in the hospital. Not that it would would matter anyways -- the only company you’ll be enjoying for the evening is that of your pipettes.

“Do you have plans for tonight?”, my PI asked while sitting in his office discussing the next steps for my project. A sense of dread runs through me at those mere words. “Just studying,” I admit. “I have two finals next week and two more the following week, so I have a lot of work to finish up” I say out loud, but running through my head, I’m thinking that my plans for the evening were to check up on my sick fish in the ‘isolation hospital tank’ I had to set up last night and how after all my studying I’d really like to get a few hours of sleep because I was up until almost 3am last night taking care of the fish and scrubbing down the entire main tank in the event that this is something viral or bacterial that could spread and cleaning and detoxifying absolutely everything short of dunking the other fish in bleach for sterilization.. and I’d really just like to get to bed early. Then comes the moment of pause, in which we both attempt to calculate in our heads how late I would have to stay tonight. Three hours to rock the GST-CBP with the glutathione beads, 45 minutes to wash the beads, and a half hour or so to add the proper proteins and antibodies, and then leaving the reaction to tumble overnight. Seeing as how it was already 3:45, that meant the earliest I would be leaving the lab would be 8… twelve hours after I arrived for the morning to set things up. Normally, I wouldn’t mind – I like being in the lab and I’m willing to put in the hours, but I desperately need some study time. “Well,” the PI asks, “can you stay and finish up? Am I being ridiculously out-of-line with this request? Tell me if I’m being ridiculous.” “No, no, not at all, no problem, I can stay…” What? Are those words coming out of my mouth? That’s my voice I’m hearing, but why am I saying such a stupid thing? I can’t stay! I don’t want to stay! I don’t have time.. I have to go home and study and get a few hours of sleep! Apparently, my brain and my vocal cords are not working on the same wavelength. I remind my PI that I have class from 9:30 – 5:30 the following day, so I won’t be able to do bench work. “No problem,” he states. “I’ll be in the lab at 8:30, we can take care of a few things before your class. Actually, come to think of it, if you want to be really assiduous, it would be great if you could come in at 7:00 to add the prot G beads.” Assiduous? No, thank you. I don’t want to be assiduous. I want to be an indolent slacker, actually. What do you mean laziness isn't acceptable in graduate school? What was I thinking? I'm too tired and stretched thin to be assiduous right now! Somehow, however, informing my PI that really, I'd rather just sleep in and be a lazy slackass didn't seem acceptable, so naturally I smiled and nodded and said that sounded like a plan. I’m not sure why I have such a hard time saying no – I guess as a graduate student, I feel like it’s my job to be in the lab all the time, which normally I don’t mind – it’s just that I’m really rather stressed about finals and I know I have to do an absolutely stellar job on the biochemistry and transformed cell finals to make up for my downright dismal biochem and lackluster transformed cell midterm grades. I think I’m also a little concerned that if I do decide to stay in this lab for my dissertation, the lab may be getting on the full side – so if I show that I am willing to put in the extra time and extra hours, maybe he will be more likely to allow me to return. Or maybe there is no real explanation, other than the fact that I am the hugest suck-up to ever grace the research building. Regardless, I wonder if it is out of line for me to ask for a sleeping bag, so that I can at least catch a few hours of zzzz’s on the lab bench, which will save me the commuting time.

So, back to the original question – did I have plans for tonight? I did indeed have penciled in several good hours of studying. But instead, I didn’t walk in my front door until 9pm, and I tended to Picasso the sick fish, replied to a few e-mails, and vented about my day. Now I am off to take a shower, and probably head to bed in the near future, since my alarm will be going off at 5:45 and I’m running on only 4 hours of sleep from last night. Studying completed tonight: zero hours. Old plan (study really hard and ace finals) out; new plan (spend bazillion hours in lab over next 3 weeks and fail finals; when letter comes kicking me out of program, cry to PI and hope he will fight to keep me in because I am so hard working and such a fabulous go-getter in the lab) in. If you need me, I'll be hard at work in the lab. Just ask for Assiduous Julie.